At times, some of the photos one comes across for adult blogging can be truly funny. Some of the situations and poses "jocks" are shown is the humorous part. I thought I would share a few I came across recently.
Think of these as a juxtaposition of "things you should do in jockstraps or gear" with "things you should not do in jockstraps or gear."
Example 1: Things You Should Do In Jockstraps Or Gear
Help a teammate forget all about losing that big game to the Centerville Cornholers. You know what that game meant to him, and you know what his mouth on your cock will mean to you. So, tell him to shut up so you can introduce him to another contact sport. Coincidentally, it also involves big things - well, sometimes it does...I guarantee you they both felt like winners after this match was finished.
Example 1: Things You Should Not Do In Jockstraps Or Gear
As a general rule, choosing to climb trees in jocks, underwear, speedos, or nylon running shorts is choosing poorly. Bark is not soft, boys and girls. It is hard and scratchy, and not like your "Daddy Bear's" hard dick and manly bush he never would dream of trimming. Bark will make you bleed. Bleeding is unattractive; though strangely enough, injuries of one type or another can increase one's male quotient a bit.
In any event, bleed enough, and you will not be getting an ace in your hole or your wick dipped. If you're lucky, someone may have an ace bandage they can give you, but that will be about it.
I speak not in hypotheticals, so heed my warning, younglings. Been there, done that! Wear jeans or sweats. Going commando in sweats can be just as hot!
Example 2: Things You Should Do In Jockstraps Or Gear
Not enough can be said of the important of squats, am I right? Think how often you bottoms out there channel the physical skills you have developed by learning to squat over and over and over and over...at all hours of the night...under the most challenging conditions at times. Think how good you look when you do it in a jockstrap...
Skills like these must be carefully honed. Only the very best squatters can squat like that without practice and I think they all live in England.
So, practice squatting...alone...a mirror (or photographer) can provide much-needed motivation.
Or, squat with a buddy. If you want to be able to keep on riding that alleged 10" cock at 3 a.m. like your Captain Cum Dump, then you can never do too many squats.
Example 2: Things You Should Not Do In Jockstraps Or Gear
This brain-child obviously wants someone's attention and yet isn't enough of an attraction to garner the attention of someone 3 feet away, let alone across a body of water. Speaking of water, where is this man's life jacket? It's a reasonable guess that this man is inebriated, so that railing isn't likely to preclude much falling. I am also pretty sure that the tatoos on his back spell, Dufus.
You know, as I am writing this though, I am starting to remember what Julie Brown used to sing back in the 80's. You know the 80's, younglings - that was the last decade when music sounded better than dried dog shit spinning in a blender.
But, I digress...Julie Brown used to sing, "I Like 'Em Big & Stupid." This one certainly fits that bill, so maybe he's all right...
Example 3: Things You Should Do In Jockstraps Or Gear
Bask in the warmth of a sunny day. You and the sun, both super hot! So super duper hot!
Perhaps, you're a bit more reserved. The guy next door type. You have the day off. The college freshman that moved in across the hall is playing around with a new camera phone. Let's say, you might just kick back and be thankful for all the many talents you have that touch people so deeply, and will certainly be touching young freshman deeply if he'd ever put that God-damn camera down...
But, for the love of _____________________ (insert Higher Power of Your Choice), don't try to build a house in your jockstrap!! This is something only a group of tweakers might attempt to do! I admit, visually, this is pretty hot. Sadly, I have never been lucky enough to have a carpenter, builder or contractor show up (a) with a body like this, or (b) in such scant attire. Usually, they look more like Norm from Cheers, except not so well-dressed and not so sober. Or, how could I forget the time that, thinking the doorbell was a long-awaited trick's arrival, I run to the door in my own jockstrap, throw it open (the door, not the jockstrap), only to discover a middle-aged Jehovah's Witness mom and her own little darling daughter passing out literature. We all just about passed out that time.
But, for the love of _____________________ (insert Higher Power of Your Choice), don't try to build a house in your jockstrap!! This is something only a group of tweakers might attempt to do! I admit, visually, this is pretty hot. Sadly, I have never been lucky enough to have a carpenter, builder or contractor show up (a) with a body like this, or (b) in such scant attire. Usually, they look more like Norm from Cheers, except not so well-dressed and not so sober. Or, how could I forget the time that, thinking the doorbell was a long-awaited trick's arrival, I run to the door in my own jockstrap, throw it open (the door, not the jockstrap), only to discover a middle-aged Jehovah's Witness mom and her own little darling daughter passing out literature. We all just about passed out that time.
As hot as this may look, in reality, I cannot stop thinking of splinters and nails going in all the wrong - ooohhh so very wrong - places. One false move with a nail gun...hold that thought in your mind.
No comments:
Post a Comment